Mojo, Party of One, Your Table Is Ready

October-I love ya, but you’ve got to slow down. I love staying busy but this is over the top. Maybe it’s because we have our Disney trip soon, but right now I am struggling with the juggling. Work, kids’ activities, family stuff-I love it all, but it seriously cuts into my blogging. Yeah, yeah, it’s a lame excuse but it’s true. (Kinda like “my dog ate my homework” only this time, the dog did). And if I’m being completely honest, I have been uninspired lately (for lots of reasons). Sometimes I wonder if I have what it takes to keep a blog fresh, inspiring, and REAL. I want that so badly but wanting it doesn’t make it so. And recent disappointments have left me questioning my writing abilities. I think my mojo up and left me. And I don’t like it. I want my mojo back.

Enter Stage Left: our Sunday School lesson. We were discussing suffering and how we should learn to welcome suffering because of what it can do for our faith. On a day where I was pretty low, this was not what I wanted to hear. Seriously, who wants to say, “Pile it on! I can take it!”? And then my friend, Gerry starts talking about how we all want to be more than mediocre, and I about lose it in class. Because I had been asking God the same question a few hours earlier. Wow-it’s something to be caught offguard in a moment where you really feel God speaking. (No need for the Veggie Tales Jonah to come out and say, “This is a message from the Lord.”) After class, I thanked Gerry for the lesson and told hom how desperately I needed to hear it. Know what he said? He had trouble coming up with a lesson for that day and it literally was Saturday night when he stumbled on this one. Chill bumps, seriously.

Stage Right was my devotional the next night: “Trust me enough to let things happen without striving to predict or control them. Relax…when you project yourself into the future, rehearsing what you will do or say, you are seeking to be self-sufficient: to be adequate without My help.” -Sarah Young, Jesus Calling. Then I started to connect the dots. I need to get out of my own way and let God be in charge. Not just in words but for real. So I left my pity party for one and didn’t look back. Sometimes it’s not so easy. I’m not saying it will work for every occasion. But with these two subtle hints, He got my attention. And that’s all I needed.

Post Script: After writing this post, I happened upon one by my friend, Ami that was perfect timing for me to read. Click here to see what I’m talking about. Ami has several blogs and I highly recommend them to you. Of course, she is a fellow Disney nut, so that makes her tops in my book! But beyond that, Ami has a distinct voice and wonderful writing style-so go check my Disney girlfriend out!!!

Brick Walls and a Kick in the Teeth

OK, I know this is no news flash for most of you, but I didn’t make the Disney Moms Panel this year. Yes, I was disappointed but not devastated. All through the process, I kept getting these reminders that really helped me keep it all in perspective. Like the news that one of Clay’s colleagues has cancer again and the doctors are now saying the new treatment won’t work. Or the friend that’s searching for a new job and her mojo simultaneously because she hasn’t done the job search thing in forever. Or the family court case I immediately had to rush to after my “thanks for applying” call–where  my client was petitioning to get her twin 2 year olds back after A YEAR in someone else’s custody. No, I’m not thrilled that these people are dealing with hardships or facing insurmountable odds-but it was something I needed to be reminded of to keep my eye on the “big picture.” I’m leaning real heavy on FAITH and TRUST and hoping that the pixie dust will happen someday-but I’ll be OK if it doesn’t (just don’t tell the selection committee I said that!)

For whatever reason, I have really been thinking alot about Randy Pausch lately. I remember watching the Last Lecture. The goosebumps hearing his story. The “oh my gosh I’m gonna cry lump in my throat” watching his wife as he delivered this inspiring lecture and knowing he would leave 3 kids behind. Maybe my emotions were ratcheted up because like Randy, my grandmother died of pancreatic cancer. So when I heard “No”, I ran to pull Pausch’s book off the shelf, searching for the quote I wanted–no, NEEDED–at that moment:

“Brick walls are there for a reason. They give us a chance to show us how badly we want something.” Amen!

Or as Walt would say, “You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.” (Seriously, this one’s a stretch-that really sounds painful!) So, after my teeth kicking, what now? Well, I am willing to go on record and say Disney better watch out next year because I’m bringing it with everything I’ve got! And for every brick wall I face, I’m gonna go after what I want with even more determination, zeal, and gumption. You’re either a Tigger or a Pooh. Well, excuse my grammar, but I ain’t no Eeyore!

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